We had the pleasure of dog sitting for Chilli (my sister's dog) for about a week. Norah is a bit timid and scared around dogs because she hasn't been exposed to them very much.
The first night he was here when I was putting her to bed she asked to have her door closed.
What?
Are you kidding me?
After everything we have been through with sleep challenges, and the discovery of an open-door policy that completely made all of them disappear, she wants her door closed now? And only because the world's sweetest dog is in the house?
Brother.
I suggested we close it but not latch it. She was satisfied, and that's what we did all week. We didn't have any issues. I just thought it was quite humorous.
Today, right after Lisa and the kids left with Chilli, I put Norah down for a nap and she was very clear about wanting her door left open again.
Gladly, my child, gladly.
Showing posts with label 2 1/2 - 3. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2 1/2 - 3. Show all posts
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Independent Play...Just in Time
We have noticed significant progress in Norah's independent play lately, and it hasn't escaped us that it is just in time for baby #2. Most often, it involves her baby dolls, and recently a newly discovered teddy bear. The three baby dolls are usually all named Mikayla, though sometimes she searches through our baby name book to find a name for them. (Ummm, I guess she has picked up on our struggle to determine a name for baby #2.)
The baby dolls do lots of things with Norah, but most often she is feeding them. She sets up elaborate spreads with stuff from her play kitchen.
Last night for supper we took it a bit further and gave this baby doll a plate of her own. Turns out she wasn't hungry.
This morning they got rides on the tricycle and in the stroller.
And then they went in a time out because they were not listening (also a common occurence).
I also hear myself come out a lot as she interacts with her baby dolls. She gets "frustrated" when they don't listen. She comforts them when they fall, and the other day when they were all going poopie on the potty she told one of them to, "push it out." Lovely.
Hey, I'll take it if it occupies her time.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Sleep Update
I long for the days that I will not need to write a blog with that title. But for now, unfortunately, we're still there. However, we're feeling better overall about the situation (or maybe our expectations are just really, really low).
The biggest thing that has changed is that we feel much more in control of the situation. This feeling is due to two decisions:
1. We put a child-proofing knob on the inside of her door. In other words, she can't get out of her room. I was against the idea for a while, but then Seth pointed out that it is really no different than if she was in her crib. And I know many people have to use them if their child's room is on the second floor and they are worried about stairs. Either way, I'm over it. It was the best thing we've done in a long time.
2. We are in hard-core cry-it-out mode. We were in it before, but in hindsight I got a little weak. One night it worked to open her door and give her a kiss. She went right to bed and we didn't hear a peep. But the next night it didn't work. My bad. Played by a 2 1/2 year old, once again. The difference now is that we only open her door if she needs a diaper change. So far she hasn't played us on that one, so let's hope that continues.
Since the lock and the crying it out, she has spent many nights sleeping on the floor right by the door, which is where she falls asleep crying. We can sometimes see her little hand sticking out from underneath her door. She often spends anywhere from 15-45 minutes crying, "Mommy...I...give...you...just...one more kiss...and...then...I...go...back to beeeeeeeddd." The nights vary a little, and we had several in a row mixed in where she stayed in her bed and didn't make a sound after we left. But more often than not we have the pleasure of listening to that sentence over and over and over before she finally drops off to sleep.
I told Seth one morning that even though it is brutal to listen to, I feel in control, which any parent will agree is a very important factor.
One of the toughest things is just getting out of her room when I put her in bed. We all three read stories together, but I am usually the one to rock her in the chair and actually put her in bed (one of the few remnants of her Mommy phase). We have a little routine once she is in bed, which ends with me warning her two times that I am going to give her one more hug and kiss and leave her room, but no matter what I can't seem to get out the door without her chasing after me asking for one more kiss. I typically end up shutting the door in her face, not wanting to give in to the continuous streak of demands. Not a good feeling, but oddly feels like the right thing to do.
Middle-of-the-night waking is much, much better. This is what was having the biggest impact on our sleep, so that has been a very welcome improvement. She has been waking up between 5:45 - 6:15 in the morning. I can handle this, too, as long as I continue to be in bed early enough.
Naps are so inconsistent they are not even worth discussing. Right now we're listening to her cry about her pony tail coming out. There's always something...
The biggest thing that has changed is that we feel much more in control of the situation. This feeling is due to two decisions:
1. We put a child-proofing knob on the inside of her door. In other words, she can't get out of her room. I was against the idea for a while, but then Seth pointed out that it is really no different than if she was in her crib. And I know many people have to use them if their child's room is on the second floor and they are worried about stairs. Either way, I'm over it. It was the best thing we've done in a long time.
2. We are in hard-core cry-it-out mode. We were in it before, but in hindsight I got a little weak. One night it worked to open her door and give her a kiss. She went right to bed and we didn't hear a peep. But the next night it didn't work. My bad. Played by a 2 1/2 year old, once again. The difference now is that we only open her door if she needs a diaper change. So far she hasn't played us on that one, so let's hope that continues.
Since the lock and the crying it out, she has spent many nights sleeping on the floor right by the door, which is where she falls asleep crying. We can sometimes see her little hand sticking out from underneath her door. She often spends anywhere from 15-45 minutes crying, "Mommy...I...give...you...just...one more kiss...and...then...I...go...back to beeeeeeeddd." The nights vary a little, and we had several in a row mixed in where she stayed in her bed and didn't make a sound after we left. But more often than not we have the pleasure of listening to that sentence over and over and over before she finally drops off to sleep.
I told Seth one morning that even though it is brutal to listen to, I feel in control, which any parent will agree is a very important factor.
One of the toughest things is just getting out of her room when I put her in bed. We all three read stories together, but I am usually the one to rock her in the chair and actually put her in bed (one of the few remnants of her Mommy phase). We have a little routine once she is in bed, which ends with me warning her two times that I am going to give her one more hug and kiss and leave her room, but no matter what I can't seem to get out the door without her chasing after me asking for one more kiss. I typically end up shutting the door in her face, not wanting to give in to the continuous streak of demands. Not a good feeling, but oddly feels like the right thing to do.
Middle-of-the-night waking is much, much better. This is what was having the biggest impact on our sleep, so that has been a very welcome improvement. She has been waking up between 5:45 - 6:15 in the morning. I can handle this, too, as long as I continue to be in bed early enough.
Naps are so inconsistent they are not even worth discussing. Right now we're listening to her cry about her pony tail coming out. There's always something...
Monday, May 9, 2011
Potty Progress (and a few cute quotes)
In the past four days Norah has made significant progress with the potty. She has used multiple public restrooms (totally gross, but unavoidable and a milestone as it means she is wearing underwear), gone number two on the potty at home, and today, for the first time, wore her underwear all day at school. Evidence below.
Here are two recent quotes that really made us really laugh:
- She came out from one of the bedrooms holding her baby doll (named Mikayla), and said, "I am very frustrated with her because she is not listening." (Gee, that sounds familiar.) Seth pointed out that, yes, it is frustrating when people don't listen very well.
- One of the first things she told me this morning in a very sad voice was, "This hand threw Nana (snuggly) down" (while pointing to her right hand).
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Cry-it-out Nights Number Three and Four
As a follow up to my previous posts on our attempt to get Norah into a better sleep routine, I can say that cry-it-out night number three was pretty much a repeat of number two. In other words, not pretty. At all.
Last night, however, was a significant improvement. She literally went down without a peep. I left her room and we did not hear another sound.
In the middle of the night she got up once and wanted her diaper changed. Can't really deny her that. Then she woke up at 5AM, but slept on and off until 6:30. Way better.
She is also doing really well with potty training. She has worn underwear and gone in public multiple times, and continues to be a champ at home. The next step will be getting her to wear underwear at school, which she has still refused for some reason.
Last night, however, was a significant improvement. She literally went down without a peep. I left her room and we did not hear another sound.
In the middle of the night she got up once and wanted her diaper changed. Can't really deny her that. Then she woke up at 5AM, but slept on and off until 6:30. Way better.
She is also doing really well with potty training. She has worn underwear and gone in public multiple times, and continues to be a champ at home. The next step will be getting her to wear underwear at school, which she has still refused for some reason.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Cry-it-out Night Number Two
It has to get worse before it gets better, right? That's what I'm going with.
I wasn't there for a bulk of the evening due to a work event, but when I arrived home at 8PM Norah was still up and crying/screaming.
Seth said he first left her room at 7PM. He went in for the first time 30-45 minutes later. She was just not calming down.
I went in at 8:30 and she was asking for music. Evidently Seth and I had miscommunciated a bit, and while I thought we were going to give in and let her music play all night he was only letting the CD run once. When I went in that is what she was asking for. I turned it on, gave her a hug and kiss, got her to lay down and explained that it was so late that even Mommy was going to bed (and she did recognize that I was in my PJs, which was helpful). Once I left we didn't hear anything.
I got up with her three times throughout the night, though the first time I don't even think she was really awake. All three times it was fairly easy to get her to lay back down and she appeard to go right back to sleep. Amazingly, I was also able to go back to sleep (at least dozed) after the 4:30 waking. My alarm went off at 6AM, and a few minutes later I heard her door open, so she definitely didn't sleep in much longer despite going to sleep later.
I pulled her into bed with me and we talked about the previous evening. My mom pointed out that she is old enough to process what we talk about related to the situation, which I think is a good point. I'm going to try to discuss it with her each morning and evening, focusing on the fact that she is a big girl and it is her decision as to when she lays quietly in bed and closes her eyes, but that mommy and daddy are not going to come in every time she starts crying.
My expectation is that we will have many more rough nights before it gets better. I just hope that one of these days we are pleasantly surprised at some progress being made.
She was super happy and pleasant this morning, as usual. Luckily she sort of redeems herself every morning, which makes it much easier to gear up for another night.
I wasn't there for a bulk of the evening due to a work event, but when I arrived home at 8PM Norah was still up and crying/screaming.
Seth said he first left her room at 7PM. He went in for the first time 30-45 minutes later. She was just not calming down.
I went in at 8:30 and she was asking for music. Evidently Seth and I had miscommunciated a bit, and while I thought we were going to give in and let her music play all night he was only letting the CD run once. When I went in that is what she was asking for. I turned it on, gave her a hug and kiss, got her to lay down and explained that it was so late that even Mommy was going to bed (and she did recognize that I was in my PJs, which was helpful). Once I left we didn't hear anything.
I got up with her three times throughout the night, though the first time I don't even think she was really awake. All three times it was fairly easy to get her to lay back down and she appeard to go right back to sleep. Amazingly, I was also able to go back to sleep (at least dozed) after the 4:30 waking. My alarm went off at 6AM, and a few minutes later I heard her door open, so she definitely didn't sleep in much longer despite going to sleep later.
I pulled her into bed with me and we talked about the previous evening. My mom pointed out that she is old enough to process what we talk about related to the situation, which I think is a good point. I'm going to try to discuss it with her each morning and evening, focusing on the fact that she is a big girl and it is her decision as to when she lays quietly in bed and closes her eyes, but that mommy and daddy are not going to come in every time she starts crying.
My expectation is that we will have many more rough nights before it gets better. I just hope that one of these days we are pleasantly surprised at some progress being made.
She was super happy and pleasant this morning, as usual. Luckily she sort of redeems herself every morning, which makes it much easier to gear up for another night.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Crying it out, toddler style
Norah has been such a good, consistent night time sleeper over the past two years that I had put us in the "lucky to have a good sleeper" category and, in true "Ang" overly optimistic style, figured we were pretty much home free.
I was wrong.
We have been having sleep issues for, well, I don't know how long. I don't really want to look back and try to figure it out and I haven't kept track because one of the main things that keeps me going is convincing myself that it is just a phase that will pass at some point.
But over the past several weeks it has really started impacting our sleep as well. And I was doing just fine having sleep problems during this pregnancy on my own, thank you very much. I require a solid 8 hours and I simply am not getting it. I know something has to change because this week in particular it has affected my ability to stay calm and patient with Norah as the struggles continue.
What struggles, you ask?
Struggles going down, struggles sleeping through the night, and struggles waking early. All of them. Every single night.
Struggles going down are really, really, really getting old. It is nearly impossible to get out of her room because she is Queen Staller. And once we manage to escape she is in and out of her bed, opening and shutting her door.
We got into the habit of responding a lot, initially chalking the difficulties up to the bed transition, wanting to calm her down and make her feel comfortable in her new environment.
Sometime during the night, every night, she wakes up, opens her door, and cries for us. We put her back in bed, give her a kiss and tell her it's the middle of the night, everyone is sleeping, and she needs to go back to sleep. She usually doesn't have a problem going back to sleep, but it is rare that at least one of us doesn't.
In the morning, she has been waking up consistently between 5:30 and 5:45. I know my expectations are low because when I first hear her I think to myself, "please let the time on my clock start with a 6." All I'm asking for is a 6.
So, as of tonight we are trying three things to improve the situation:
1. We ordered a white noise machine because she seems to be a light sleeper. I told Seth to please help me not be my typical overly optimistic self and get any amount of hope that it is a magic bullet. We turned it on for the first time and told her we weren't going to listen to music anymore. We planned to try no music in an attempt to take away anything that helps her fall asleep and isn't present when she wakes up other times of night.
2. I am making the final part of the routine (when I try to get out of the room) as quick and straightforward as possible. I give her the two minute warning for when Mommy is going to leave. Then the one minute warning. Then I crawl out of her bed (getting harder the bigger I get), and we give each other one hug, one kiss, and one zerbert.
3. We are going back to "crying it out" basics...toddler style (i.e. not pretty).
Here is how Cry-it-out Night Number One went:
6:50 - I leave Norah's room (this is a bit earlier than it has been, but since it's been taking a while for her to actually get to sleep I want to attempt to start earlier).
7:20 - Norah has been crying and playing off and on. She opens her door and cries/screams over and over that she wants her music on and the white noise off. We make a joint decision to put her music on, but also leave the white noise machine on. I go in and turn music on. I escape as quickly as possible, but there is much crying and pleading involved.
7:25 - Norah cries/screams over and over that her diaper is wet. Not sure what to do, I go in and change her diaper (call me a sucker, I just don't know what the right answer is). I escape as quickly as possible, but there is much crying and pleading involved.
7:30 - I hear Norah playing with the night light, which is obviously a major safety issue (note to self - purchase portable night light that does not get plugged in). I go in and calmly explain that she cannot play with the night lights, that it is not safe, they are not toys, etc. I escape as quickly as possible, but there is much crying and pleading involved.
7:33 (immediately after I leave the room) - Norah starts screaming for me to "be by my bedroom" which is something she frequently requests over and over and over again. I pop my head in and attempt to convince her I won't be far away.
7:45 - she has been quiet and I pronounce her asleep.
So nearly an hour later, with 3 1/2 returns to her room, she is finally asleep. The difference is that typically we had been trying to react immediately to her pleas and cries to keep her calm and get her to fall asleep, so there really wasn't much crying. I guess the only difference tonight was that we had the pleasure of listening to her cry as well.
Maybe Cry-it-out Night Number Two will go better tomorrow. I'm pretty convinced this is what we have to do (or at least try).
One last comment, perhaps to defend our actions a bit: Norah has a lot going on these days. We transitioned her to her "big girl" bed, she is potty training, and presumably senses change coming with the baby, but doesn't really know what it all means. That's a lot for a 2 1/2 year old to handle.
But I just can't go on this way, at least without trying some different approaches. I don't have any answers for the middle-of-the-night and early wakings yet, but figure we'll tackle bedtime first and hope the others eventually improve.
I'll save the major nap struggles for another day...
I was wrong.
We have been having sleep issues for, well, I don't know how long. I don't really want to look back and try to figure it out and I haven't kept track because one of the main things that keeps me going is convincing myself that it is just a phase that will pass at some point.
But over the past several weeks it has really started impacting our sleep as well. And I was doing just fine having sleep problems during this pregnancy on my own, thank you very much. I require a solid 8 hours and I simply am not getting it. I know something has to change because this week in particular it has affected my ability to stay calm and patient with Norah as the struggles continue.
What struggles, you ask?
Struggles going down, struggles sleeping through the night, and struggles waking early. All of them. Every single night.
Struggles going down are really, really, really getting old. It is nearly impossible to get out of her room because she is Queen Staller. And once we manage to escape she is in and out of her bed, opening and shutting her door.
We got into the habit of responding a lot, initially chalking the difficulties up to the bed transition, wanting to calm her down and make her feel comfortable in her new environment.
Sometime during the night, every night, she wakes up, opens her door, and cries for us. We put her back in bed, give her a kiss and tell her it's the middle of the night, everyone is sleeping, and she needs to go back to sleep. She usually doesn't have a problem going back to sleep, but it is rare that at least one of us doesn't.
In the morning, she has been waking up consistently between 5:30 and 5:45. I know my expectations are low because when I first hear her I think to myself, "please let the time on my clock start with a 6." All I'm asking for is a 6.
So, as of tonight we are trying three things to improve the situation:
1. We ordered a white noise machine because she seems to be a light sleeper. I told Seth to please help me not be my typical overly optimistic self and get any amount of hope that it is a magic bullet. We turned it on for the first time and told her we weren't going to listen to music anymore. We planned to try no music in an attempt to take away anything that helps her fall asleep and isn't present when she wakes up other times of night.
2. I am making the final part of the routine (when I try to get out of the room) as quick and straightforward as possible. I give her the two minute warning for when Mommy is going to leave. Then the one minute warning. Then I crawl out of her bed (getting harder the bigger I get), and we give each other one hug, one kiss, and one zerbert.
3. We are going back to "crying it out" basics...toddler style (i.e. not pretty).
Here is how Cry-it-out Night Number One went:
6:50 - I leave Norah's room (this is a bit earlier than it has been, but since it's been taking a while for her to actually get to sleep I want to attempt to start earlier).
7:20 - Norah has been crying and playing off and on. She opens her door and cries/screams over and over that she wants her music on and the white noise off. We make a joint decision to put her music on, but also leave the white noise machine on. I go in and turn music on. I escape as quickly as possible, but there is much crying and pleading involved.
7:25 - Norah cries/screams over and over that her diaper is wet. Not sure what to do, I go in and change her diaper (call me a sucker, I just don't know what the right answer is). I escape as quickly as possible, but there is much crying and pleading involved.
7:30 - I hear Norah playing with the night light, which is obviously a major safety issue (note to self - purchase portable night light that does not get plugged in). I go in and calmly explain that she cannot play with the night lights, that it is not safe, they are not toys, etc. I escape as quickly as possible, but there is much crying and pleading involved.
7:33 (immediately after I leave the room) - Norah starts screaming for me to "be by my bedroom" which is something she frequently requests over and over and over again. I pop my head in and attempt to convince her I won't be far away.
7:45 - she has been quiet and I pronounce her asleep.
So nearly an hour later, with 3 1/2 returns to her room, she is finally asleep. The difference is that typically we had been trying to react immediately to her pleas and cries to keep her calm and get her to fall asleep, so there really wasn't much crying. I guess the only difference tonight was that we had the pleasure of listening to her cry as well.
Maybe Cry-it-out Night Number Two will go better tomorrow. I'm pretty convinced this is what we have to do (or at least try).
One last comment, perhaps to defend our actions a bit: Norah has a lot going on these days. We transitioned her to her "big girl" bed, she is potty training, and presumably senses change coming with the baby, but doesn't really know what it all means. That's a lot for a 2 1/2 year old to handle.
But I just can't go on this way, at least without trying some different approaches. I don't have any answers for the middle-of-the-night and early wakings yet, but figure we'll tackle bedtime first and hope the others eventually improve.
I'll save the major nap struggles for another day...
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
An Early Lesson
Yesterday on the way to school/work Norah asked, "Mommy, where we going first?"
Me: Where do we usually go first?
Norah: School.
Me: Yep, that's right. We're going to school.
Norah: You drop me off and school and go to store?
Me: Is that what you think I do all day when you are at school - go shopping?
Norah: Yeah, Target!
(Oh, man.)
Me: Okay, let's be clear about this. Mommy doesn't go shopping when you're at school, I go to work.
Norah: Ohhh.
Me: Do you know why I go to work?
Norah: Why you go to work, Mommy?
Me: So you can go to college.
Norah: College?
Me: That's right, college.
In her defense she probably noticed I carried a shopping bag to the car that morning, which is what triggered the shopping thought, but still - I had to at least attempt to set things straight.
Later that night Seth asked Norah why Mommy works and she said, "So I can go to Denver!"
Oops...I think there was a little mixup between two new and unfamiliar words. We'll keep working on the college message.
Me: Where do we usually go first?
Norah: School.
Me: Yep, that's right. We're going to school.
Norah: You drop me off and school and go to store?
Me: Is that what you think I do all day when you are at school - go shopping?
Norah: Yeah, Target!
(Oh, man.)
Me: Okay, let's be clear about this. Mommy doesn't go shopping when you're at school, I go to work.
Norah: Ohhh.
Me: Do you know why I go to work?
Norah: Why you go to work, Mommy?
Me: So you can go to college.
Norah: College?
Me: That's right, college.
In her defense she probably noticed I carried a shopping bag to the car that morning, which is what triggered the shopping thought, but still - I had to at least attempt to set things straight.
Later that night Seth asked Norah why Mommy works and she said, "So I can go to Denver!"
Oops...I think there was a little mixup between two new and unfamiliar words. We'll keep working on the college message.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Happy Easter!
We spent most of Easter weekend at the lake for one last family gathering before Mimi and Papa head back to Chicago for the summer. They are going a bit earlier than usual this year, since they will be back in June/July once the baby is born, and will spend more time (hopefully!) than they typically do for a summer visit.
We swam at the pool, hunted for Easter eggs, and fetched food and water for the kids. We helped Norah go to the potty 112 times. We changed Mikayla's diaper, gave her bottles, and cuddled her. We disciplined and we laughed. We applied sunscreen, changed the kid's clothes, and got more food and water for the kids. While we weren't busy doing any of that, we sat on the patio and enjoyed the scenery.
We figured out a way for everyone to sleep, and wondered what we'll do when Norah is out of the pack 'n play and we add another infant to the mix.
Mom made a wonderful supper and added yet another breakfast casserole to her already extensive repertoire.
It was a great weekend. Here is some proof.
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